People. I hate people. And now they are everywhere. In this city, lots of them. And a Mumbai local train is packed with the horror. I am one of the people too, I know. But the kind that just doesn't leave you alone, that's what I hate. People are always trying to help you or harm you. People try to be a part of your life. People become a part of your life. That's not what I want. And I, well I do my best to stop that from happening.
"Madam, chai?"
The tea vendor's voice dragged me back to the world of people. I nodded politely,or rather, what I thought would be a polite nod to refuse. I turned to look out of the window again.
I had never been able to figure out how to interact with people. A smile could be too warm, and a frown could be too cold. I just didn't know what temperature setting on the mood-meter was ideal for a particular situation.
It was late at night, and my mother's advice was to board the general compartment in the local train. She, like most others, considered it to be a 'safe' option for a girl of my age. Well, that was great because now I had two genders of people to cope up with!
I had boarded the train earlier, and it was nearly empty when I did so. If only I had known it would be so stuffed with people along the line. The ladies compartment would have been more comfortable and, with the number of people there, there was probably no safety issue. I could have switched over, but that would have meant moving amongst the people. Squeezing, stretching with the loads of baggage I had... the very thought freaks me out.
A tubelight overhead kept flickering throughout. Annoying. I could have just closed my eyes to shut out both the problems: the tubelight and ofcourse, the people. However, closing my eyes would probably make me fall asleep, and I didn't want that to happen for sure! So I just had to deal with it.
"Just keep looking out of the window," I said to myself. My neck did ache, and once in a while when my instinct told me no one would be looking at me I would turn my neck to the other side. Twice it so happened I met the gaze of another
; once of a little child, the other of a man staring emptily in space. In both cases, I jerked my head back to look out of the window, pretending I hadn't seen them. I just didn't know how to react if they had smiled, nodded or just stared back!
Finally, the train arrived at its final destination. I was to get off here like all the remaining passengers. But I chose to remain in my seat till they were all gone. I did make an attempt to move once or twice, when I thought the coach had been emptied but a nearby cough or shifting movement made me give up. Surprisingly, no one tried to inform me that it was the last station the train stopped at; which was good. I just gazed out of the window. Passengers scurried along the dimly-lit platform. People. But atleast they weren't looking at me, or caring about me. It was the last train on the route. No one would be boarding the train either.
After what felt like an eternity, I slowly turned my aching neck to the other side The coach was empty. Dead silent too. I got up slowly, doing some neck-stretches at the same time.
My bags weighed a ton. I slowly dragged them to the door. The platform was low, and it would have taken much effort to place my bags upon the ground. Just as I was figuring out how to get them down on the platform, a silhouette appeared from the the shadows. My people-sensor alarm went off. I stiffened and stood frozen there. It was a young man of my age. What was he doing there? Had he been there all this while?
"I suppose you'll need help with that." he said. Even before I could response, he had reached out to one of my bags, and had placed it on the platform. He did the same with my other bags in a jiffy, before offering me a hand to get down.
"Thank you." I said.
"My pleasure." he replied with a smile.
I smiled at him before hurrying down the platform. I didn't want to engage myself in a conversation with another of those people! And I hope that my smile had been appropriate. I don't even know if he had seen it or not. But I do know one thing; I did not think before smiling.